The days to follow

The next week or two waiting for the appointment were horrifying to say the least. By this time I had obviously informed my parents of the previous phone call, and they were both reassuring as to the chance that it was just a simple, abnormal test. After all, that happens a lot, right? The day finally came and everyone I had told wished me luck, and my mother and ever supportive boyfriend went with me to the doctor.

 We had a humorous argument in the waiting room about an advertised 4D ultrasound. Obviously, there is no such thing as 4D, and no nurse whatsoever could explain what it was. Needless to say this took my mind off of things for a while. If you know someone in this position so far, or later on in my chronicle, trust me the best thing you can do is distract them. Telling them it will all be o.k. and over soon may seem like the right thing to do, as well as your natural reaction, but in some cases it isn't. For me, it made me quite angry. I always sternly replied with, " You don't know that," or, " How could you say that right now?"

 I was called into the room and undressed into that horrid paper gown I was so familiar with by that point. My doctor walked in and had a seat in front of me, and gave me the run down. Turns out it wasn't just an oxymoron of a normal, abnormal test result. She explained it to me on a time line of sorts, and told me I had cancerous cells on my cervix. I have a long line of cancer in the family, as she pointed out, and the conversation seemed to last forever. I couldn't even pay attention to my fullest ability. Already, my worst nightmare had come to fruition, but I had to hold back the tears. Did I really though? I don't have a clue, but I did my best.

We proceeded with the biopsy, which by the way, isn't as bad as it sounds. I was incredibly frightened, I will not deny that. But as it turns out, there are not many nerve endings there. So, if you are having this done, try not to fret too much. I know that does NOTHING to help the anxiety, trust me. But, I am telling you from experience that there was no pain. The results would be back in about a week, and all I had left was her caring words and massive amount of cancer pamphlets.